5.12.2012

Blogging Positively // Don't Feed the Haters

There's been something I've noticed others talking about across many social platforms recently: Blogging Negativity

This (fortunately or unfortunately depending on how you read this article) is something I've never run into personally through blogging or through twitter, instagram, etc.  The reason I am writing this post is to ask you to enlighten me a little bit.  I have been made upset by the comments on other blogs that I love about very immature things regarding weight, style, personal life, etc but I haven't been outright discouraged by it or thought I may get discouraged if it had happened to me.  While I am advocating a don't feed the haters attitude, I think negativity is something that people getting into blogging need to know about.

My philosophy on life, and I think this reflects on blogging, is to be positive.  Because, and I really do think, that positivity breeds positivity and there is no use complaining all the time especially about things you can't control.  So with Five Sixteenths my goal is to focus on the things I can control, and that (for the most part) isn't how others approach my blog.  I don't mean to sound petty, but often times we are judgemental or critical of things we are jealous of, things we don't understand, etc...but remember everyone in life is fighting (just like you are) everyday for their lives.  We may not know it but we are all on the brink of nothingness everyday.

What do I mean about not being able to control other's approach to my blog?  I mean that either people just plain ol disagree with me or they just plain ol aren't buying what I'm laying down.  Don't get me wrong I've bitched and moaned in the past on here, but since those posts I've developed the idea of I'm not going to complain unless the outcome is beneficial. For example, looking back on this post reminded me that I needed to refocus on my blog, shop, & art efforts after moving.  It's ok to get discouraged if you channel it into energy to do something good.

I think another key thing in this whole business of blogging is blogging honestly. Now I don't mean putting everything out there.  No one needs to know your address, or your income, or what you do off the blog but your blog should reflect some sort of realness.  I'd like to say that 90% of my life is shared on the blog, honestly.  I don't share my home really because (one) Five Sixteenths isn't about my house and (two) I am messy and my room is messy and my studio is messy and there are clothes everywhere and I don't want to feel like you are my mom over my shoulder telling me to clean my room and (three) I'm not settled down yet.  I consider myself sort of a nomad with no need to establish myself & buy a house or put claim to any city because I am young!  Which is why the move to Michigan sounds so exciting (I'll talk more about that later!)  There are tons of other things that I keep off of the blog, but I feel like I started this & I need to be honest.  No one knows how to go through life & we all look for inspiration from others.  If I am a reader of a blog I want to feel that the blogger is open & honest about the adventure she calls her life.  After all, we did chose to put our lives online (which warrants reservation) but if you chose to share something with me, be honest.  That's all I ask of my friends & that's all I ask of the bloggers behind the sites I read.  You don't have to tell me everything but be at least respectable & truthful!

With that being said, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything.  If you have something constructive to say, please let me know.  Personally I love to learn & grow.  However I do know that some constructive comments or thoughts aren't always well received because online & through text you can't perceive sarcasm & tone.  Also, if they don't ask for your opinion, you should probably not give it to them.  Additionally, if they start doing something that you don't like - for example you really liked their long hair but they cut it off - they probably don't want to hear 'why did you cut your hair, it was so gorgeous' or 'you shouldn't have cut your hair, I don't like it'.  Honestly, they probably don't care.

'Why don't they care?' you ask me.  Well, they don't care because first & formost they probably started this blog for themselves.  It is their blog afterall, they aren't blogging for you.  They are blogging to share their journey with you.  As a reader you are free to come & go to blogs you please...but I feel that as a blogger develops, so does the blog, and so does the reader.

At any rate, this is a big old ramble just to say Stop Obsessing over Negativity & please stop sharing it with me.  Don't Feed the Haters.  I try to surround myself with supportive people & try to support the people I surround myself with.  (So if you are feeling the negativity at least know that there is one person out there supporting you - Moe from Five Sixteenths)

And now, I want to know from you: Am I completely off base? Should I be totally concerned with the negativity in the blogging community?  Please let me know what you think.






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3 comments:

  1. I firstly want to comment about one of your paragraphs about the honesty and blogging. One of the reasons why I'm particularly drawn too, and keep reading lifestyle blogs is because they offer something about the person. Even if they go off and talk about fashion or beauty, knowing they have a personality and knowing something of themselves really helps me to understand their outlook on other things. I'm all for not telling the world everything about yourself but its good to share - that's why I try and talk about when I was in an LDR or moving countries and visas - it might just help someone.

    I too have never faced any negative comments on my blog [touch wood] but I have seen it on a couple - yet the negative comments often come from people on "anon" names. Just showing how childish they really are.

    I think you have to be aware of the negativity and know that as a blogger, and even as a reader we can all have negative and down days. Occasionally mentioning them [I call them my rant posts] just comes to show we're all human at the end of the day. Plus it's what you do with that negativity which is the important bit. If you're away of it and try and channel it into something positive then it can only be a good thing.

    I do hope this makes some sort of sense!

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  2. I think you're right there Rachael - having a good old rant every now and then can be therapeutic and people who have been through similar things will be able to relate.

    Just so long as it's only sometimes.

    I think Moe is right - focussing on negativity just gives that person far more power and influence than they deserve. Better to ignore - delte their comments even and just move on.

    I must admit I would be more likely to complain on behalf of someone else (if I saw someone having a go at one of my favourite bloggers) then I would on my own behalf. Not sure why that is - but I am like that in "real life" too!!

    Great post Moe,

    Sarah
    http://acatlikecuriosity.blogspot.co.uk/

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  3. omg I agree so much! The other day someone introduced me to GOMI and said I'd get addicted. I didn't. The pure negativity and hate expressed there just does not interest me. The idea that people "hate-read" something is beyond my comprehension!

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Hi there, thanks so much for taking the time to comment. I love &value each & every one! If you have a question, I will respond as soon as I can. Don't be afraid to shoot me an email! If you have a blog, I will pop on by :)